You and I have never seen him. He does his dastardly deed before we arrive.

Like a thief in the night he attaches his hideous remnants of mud on our clean, clear walls and then lickety-split...he's gone!

I'm talkin' 'bout Dexter! Dexter the Bad Texture Guy!

We've all seen his heavy-handedness...that darn wall repair that looks like the winter project of Mrs. Fairchild's kindergarten class or that ceiling texture in your dining room that looks eerily like the stalactites you once visited at Carlsbad Caverns (wouldn't you like to impale Dexter on one of them?).

In Dexter's Heyday

There was a period in time, somewhere around 1978, when rough, heavy textures were in style. And why not... In 1978 we were wearing plaids with stripes!

But here in 2007 we have returned to reality and we now think that a room's texture should not be the focus of attention but rather a subtle compliment to color. (I suppose there are some specific exceptions to this rule...you can talk to design 'sperts 'bout that).

This time we will talk about different kinds of textures...they actually have names: icicle (Dexter's favorite), stomp, knockdown, orange peel (or splatter), popcorn (also called acoustic or cottage cheese...believe me it should never be eaten or seen!), stomp and drag, sand, sand swirl, mud swirl, slap brush, etc...seems there are more textures than there are bad Houston drivers!

In my opinion, the most attractive, commonly used modern textures are the orange peel and the knockdown.

In the next column I will show you how to accomplish these two textures and how to make a sheetrock repair job virtually invisible.

It's true...you and I have never seen Dexter the Bad Texture Guy, but I personally think he must look something like this: